Most of the time, people feel offended or upset they get called "ugly" or "fat". "Short" and "you have laugh lines" work too. But why? Is there really a need to react like that?
Here's the thing, this is not going to be another one of those posts where I teach you to love yourself and tell you you're beautiful and no one can tell you otherwise. To me, those are bullshit. Anyone can tell me I'm ugly, in other words, not beautiful. My parents tell their friends I'm short and have no boobs. Nobody has ever successfully taught me how to love myself. Heck, what does 'love yourself' mean anyway? To workout and eat clean everyday? To feel positive and fill my life with 'good vibes' everyday? HOW DO PEOPLE EVEN DO THAT EVERY SINGLE DAY?
Face it, most of the time when you look into the mirror, you see thick thighs, an asymmetrical face, flabby arms, a bulging tummy and the list goes on (most likely longer than those legs). So what? Aren't those just characteristics of your body parts? When someone says "you are fat", they most probably mean it. Unless they are assholes who tell that to everyone they hate or something of that sort, yes they do mean it. So what?
Fat, short, stubby, too skinny, ugly, loud; they are all adjectives to describe us. Even the dictionary agrees. Of course I admire models on Tumblr and even my close friends who have good-looking features, but if they have it then let them flaunt it (in every right way possible). For us, it's alright to not be as good-looking isn't it? I am better at making stupid jokes than X who just got 3486 likes on her Instagram post in 15 minutes. I am better at math than Y who distracts me in class every lesson with her good looks. I am better at writing than Z who never has to worry about having meals alone.
My point is to let the good-looking people do their thing, and we can continue with ours. If you think you are good-looking, go ahead and do your thing and be good at it! If you dress well, continue doing it and get better! If you draw well, draw the good-looking, AND the ugly! If you still can't find anything you are good at (like me), find every opportunity to try things out that you believe you have a chance to show yourself off. It's okay to show off, but never be arrogant. Continue learning as if you know nothing at all in the first place. Diving into more experiences lets you understand yourself more instead of wallowing in self-pity or wasting time away.
Life isn't all beautiful. Look at the Gaza crisis, MH370 / MH17 and the state of humanity as a whole. Stop wasting time trying to make yourself think that life is beautiful and start living. Get out of your comfort zone. I never knew I'd like photography until I saved up for a camera. I never knew I'd like serving customers until I got into the F&B industry. You think you are fine with what you have now, but you never know what may just change your lifestyle for the better forever.
If life is comfortable for you, you aren't living.
The next time someone calls you something "negative", suck it up, because that's you. The world has decided the negatives and positives for you so much that you have believed in it.
I am not fat but fatter than average, I have laugh lines, I have single eyelids with barely visible eyelashes that can never be curled (I'm serious!), I have thick thighs, and very bad skin because of eczema. What about you? :-)
xx
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